Walk Of Shame Recipe

Prep

Split the glazed donut horizontally with a serrated knife. Set aside cut sides exposed. Pat the bacon dry if needed and have the sausage patty and egg ready at the stove.

Cook bacon

Place a medium nonstick or cast-iron skillet over medium heat. Add the bacon strips in a single layer and cook 3–5 minutes per side until browned and slightly crisp (time depends on thickness). Transfer bacon to a paper towel–lined plate and reserve 1 tablespoon of bacon fat in the skillet; discard excess or save for another use.

Cook sausage

Return skillet with reserved bacon fat to medium heat. Add the breakfast sausage patty and cook 3–4 minutes per side (internal temperature 160°F/71°C) until well browned. Transfer sausage to a plate and keep warm.

Fry egg

Wipe skillet clean and add 1 teaspoon neutral oil and 1 tablespoon unsalted butter over medium-low heat. Crack the egg into the skillet and season with 1/8 tsp black pepper and a pinch (about 1/8 tsp) of salt. For slightly runny yolk, cook until whites are set but yolk still jiggly, about 2–3 minutes for sunny-side-up covered with a lid for 45–60 seconds; for over-easy, cook 1–2 minutes then flip and cook 15–30 seconds. Remove egg and set on top of the sausage to retain heat.

Assemble and melt cheese

Place the bottom half of the split donut on a heatproof plate. Layer the sausage patty, then the fried egg, then the bacon strips. Top with the American cheese slice, then place the top half of the donut over everything. To melt cheese and warm the donut, place the assembled sandwich under a broiler for 30–60 seconds or return to skillet over very low heat covered for 45–60 seconds, pressing gently so the donut contacts the cheese. Watch carefully to avoid burning; the goal is melted cheese and warmed donut.

Finish

Remove sandwich from heat. Let rest 30 seconds, then cut in half if desired. Serve immediately alongside hoe fries and condiments (ketchup and/or hot sauce).

Prep potatoes

Wash and scrub the russet potatoes. Leave skin on. Using a chef's knife, cut potatoes into 1/3–1/2" thick rounds and then into long wedges or sticks (hoe-fries style). Pat dry thoroughly with a clean towel or paper towels — removing surface moisture helps achieve crispness.

Season

In a large bowl, toss the dried potato pieces with smoked paprika, garlic powder, onion powder, 1 tsp kosher salt, and 1/4 tsp black pepper until evenly coated.

Cook fries

Heat 1 cup vegetable oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat until shimmering (about 350°F if using a thermometer). Add potato pieces in a single layer without overcrowding (work in batches if necessary). Fry, turning occasionally, until golden brown and crisp on all sides, about 6–9 minutes per batch depending on thickness. Use a slotted spoon to transfer cooked fries to a paper-towel-lined tray to drain. Immediately taste and add a light pinch of salt if needed.

Finish and serve

If desired, toss hot fries with chopped parsley. Plate the hoe fries alongside the donut sandwich and provide ketchup and/or hot sauce for dipping.

Serve ketchup and hot sauce in small ramekins alongside the sandwich and fries. Offer extra napkins — this sandwich is indulgent and best eaten hot.