In a large bowl whisk together all-purpose flour, cornstarch, garlic powder, onion powder, smoked paprika, salt and black pepper. Whisk in cold water and the egg until you have a smooth, slightly thick batter that coats the back of a spoon. If batter is too thick, add up to 2 tablespoons more water; too thin and it won't cling.

Coat florets

Working in batches to avoid crowding, dip each cauliflower floret into the batter, letting excess drip off, then set on a wire rack or tray lined with parchment. Allow coated florets to rest 5 minutes so the batter adheres.

Fry

Heat neutral oil in a deep skillet or saucepan to 350°F (175°C) or until a small dollop of batter sizzles and browns in 30–45 seconds. Fry cauliflower in batches (do not overcrowd) 3–5 minutes per batch, turning occasionally, until golden brown and crisp. Use a slotted spoon to transfer fried florets to a paper towel–lined tray to drain. Keep warm in a low oven (200°F / 95°C) if desired while finishing other batches.

Buffalo Sauce

Make sauce

In a small saucepan over low heat, melt the unsalted butter. Stir in the hot sauce, brown sugar, apple cider vinegar, Worcestershire sauce and honey. Whisk until fully combined and glossy, taste and adjust heat with extra hot sauce if desired. Keep the sauce warm on the lowest setting so it stays pourable.

Toss cauliflower in sauce

Place drained fried cauliflower in a large mixing bowl. Pour the warm buffalo sauce over the florets and gently toss with tongs or two spoons until each piece is evenly coated. Work quickly so the batter remains crisp but gets sauced.

Garnish & Serve

Season & garnish

Transfer sauced cauliflower to a serving platter. Sprinkle the house seasoning evenly over the wings. Scatter chopped parsley and thinly sliced green onions on top for freshness and color.

Prepare ranch

If needed, thin store-bought ranch with up to 2 tablespoons buttermilk to desired consistency and season with freshly ground black pepper to taste. Serve ranch in a small bowl alongside the wings for dipping.

Serve

Serve immediately while hot and crispy. Recommend providing extra napkins and a small bowl for bones or discarded bits if needed.